Wednesday, August 31, 2011

49#Ai no Kotoba ~ Am I Lonely?


this is an emo post. if you wanna sort-of-vomitting, please don't read it...

Sometimes I regret my past year. It's 2010. I'm very lazy to study Add Maths. My focus only for Bio and History, my favourite subjects. Because of my laziness, I dropped to the second class at 2011, left all my besties at Biruni. Although I'm always can keep ranting with them, joking around but it's not the same. All my besties are in Biruni and till now I can't keep with my classmates of Nafis. 

I'm never feel lonely being in a class since this year

From January till present, there's no one know how I felt. This is the first time and I think I can't hold it anymore. I have to do something to keep myself calm. And, I decide to blog. Thinking about this will make me cry. I'm always regret myself when I look at my besties doing things together. From small things to big things. Although I'm just seeing them walk together to go to the school lab, I will start regretting my past.

Sometimes I wanna cry. I regret my hatred towards Add Maths. If I studying Add Maths properly, maybe I'm still with them at Biruni. I can't laugh the same I had laughed with my besties at Biruni. I can't keep up myself and always keep distance from my present classmates. 

Thank God I got Nana and Mok Chick in the class. Having them make me feel better. I love you guys sincerely from my heart :').

Sometimes I wonder, if there is a time machine, I really want to go back to January 2010. It's all because of Add Maths, I dropped to the second class. Yeah, it's totally my fault.  


  1. dear sis hana, u dunno me 4 sure, i'm just one of ur readers :) but it seems like ur just in the same situation i've been trough before, even though i'm younger. lonely? sure, coz not all d time our friends can be totally beside us. but sincerely, it teaches a lot, on how to stand by ourselves, how to deal with a whole new world.really. after school surely we gonna get seperated with our friends. that is the point where we gotta be strong without others, and deal with everybody around to keep moving on.. be strong, :)

  2. thank you soooo much dear^^ *hughs you hehe
    let both of you and me handle this situation wisely in God's blessing. He knows what the best for us and we must trust Him. Insya'Allah :)


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